The good thing

My flat was given to someone else. I am very disappointed, but don't want to dwell on that.

Let's focus on the good thing: My new bed has arrived! It came on Monday. I was so excited, and all morning time seemed to crawl. Then finally, around one o'clock the company called saying they were on their way. I let them in, they started unwrapping the bed and putting on the feet when they noticed that the fifth foot in the middle of the bed was missing. They had to go back to get it. But I was already late for work, so I reluctantly left (my mother was home to supervise things) and went to work, where I couldn't concentrate all afternoon. On the way home, I tried to imagine what my room looked like with the new bed, but somehow I couldn't.

When I entered my room the bed seemed HUGE. It is only a double bed, but my room is small and the bed is very high. I took off my shoes and threw myself down on it - heaven.
Then of course my sisters had to try it, and my father, and our dog. They all liked it, but said it was very soft (the dog didn't mind). Well, that's.the.point! It's soft but due to the amount of springs you are well supported.

Unfortunately the fitted bed skirt was not finished, so they lent me a ready-made one until it arrives. The one I chose is off-white, but the replacement skirt is brown. And a little short. But it's only for a month, so that's okay.

But now, the most important question: How did I sleep? Well, the first night I woke all the time, because that's the way it is in any strange bed I sleep in. I was also hot, because the topper has wool in it, as does the duvet. But the second and third night were wonderful. Sleeping so deeply that you can't remember what day it is on waking is a good sign, right? It really felt as if I had come back from another world. I am so happy. And going to bed is a joy now, not a nuisance.

There will be pictures as soon as I find my camera...

Law of Attraction and the perfect bed

It all began with a night in a hotel in summer 2010. It wasn't even a good hotel. But it had a box spring bed. Or an american bed, a hotel bed, you know, the kind of bed one sees in all american films and series? High, springy and soft, without a bed frame. I slept so well that night, and the bed never left my mind. That was the first step: the desire.

Such beds might be the norm in America, but here in Switzerland they are rare. Beds sold here have a bed frame, sprung slats and a mattress on top. Most are very low, which I find ugly and uncomfortable. Back home, I saw such a box spring bed in a shop window. It was by VI Spring, a very good and expensive company. I decided that I wanted such a bed, and I was going to get it. That was the second step: I consciously decided what I wanted.

At the time I had no money, so I just ordered a catalog and looked online for other manufacturers of such beds. I found a company near me that imports beds from finland, so I went there, tried different beds, let them give me a cost estimate and said I would be coming back when I had money. That was the third step: concentrating on it, going to look at and try it, acting as if I was going to buy it. And feeling good while doing it, too - that's important!
Here is the shop:

Then I just kept it in my mind for a while, imagining where it would stand, how it would look, feel and sound. That was the next step: Visualising, feeling as if I already got it.

That is the logic of the Law of Attraction: In order to receive the bed, I had to feel like I already had the bed. I also got a new pillow, which was not very expensive, and concentrated on the comfort of it before I went to sleep at night.

If you think "Don't have good bed, want good bed" all the time, and notice the discomfort of your old bed or your current situation, the universe will send you the essence of your thought, which is: a lack of a good bed. So, you will not get a new bed. What I tried to reach instead were the thoughts and joyful feeling of already having the bed.

After graduation, when I had a part time job and some money, the time had finally come for the next step: actually getting my bed. I went back to the shop and took my time trying the beds again, choosing the most comfortable one. This time I ordered it. Now all I had to do was wait. Patience is not my strong point, but what could I do? And now, on Monday, it will be delivered. My old, narrow, creaky bed with the thin mattress can go, and I will sleep in a big, fat, springy luxurious bed!

As I said before: Wheeeee!

Flat

No, I'm not talking about ballet slippers. I will, but not today.

I'm talking about my flat. It is perfect for me, the perfect size (one room, a small kitchen and bathroom, with a balcony), beautiful view over the city and hills (it's on the 8th floor!), cheap and neat! I just have to get it!

At the moment I am still living with my parents. Don't get me wrong, I love them and my sisters and our dog and our flat where we lived for 25 years. But I am grown up now and ready to move on. And I can still visit them, we will live in the same city.

Until there is more money, I shall live rather simply. The greater part of the furniture will be my old things from my room, such as my desk, chair, armchair, shelves, bedside table etc. I will need a new big wardrobe, not just for clothes but for general storage. No clutter in a small flat! I'm thinking of sliding mirrored doors, so the wardrobe can double as a huge mirror wall for ballet! And a chest of drawers. Those are the most important pieces of furniture.

Then, I will of course install a barre. I have one now, a free standing one I built myself. Here it is:

But fixed to the wall is better, because it is more stable and I don't have to put it away after practising. The actual wooden barre can be taken off and attached to the wall.

Thank goodness I have been buying many kitchen things in the last months, so that I have enough pots and pans, knives, boards and lovely cutlery and cups. All I need are some small things and glasses and plates, but I can nick those from my parents, they have several sets. And then I'm going to buy a few small appliances like a kettle, scales, blender etc. My youngest sister said she will give me a telephone (she joked about a hamburger phone - NO!).

I am telling you, this is a dream coming true for me. For as long as I can remember, I have dreamed about having my own kitchen. With my own things in it. My own bathroom. My own hall. My own window with a window sill. Wheeeee! I'm so excited!

Of course, the most important thing is my bed. My new bed. That will arrive on Monday. Wheeee!  (But more about the bed later)
Oh, and the lamps! I love lamps, there are about seven lamps in my room right now. My favourite is my baby, my luxury object, the first really beautiful and expensive thing I ever got (not counting the chanel perfume): A bourgie lamp by Kartell. (Yes, it's transparent. And huge)

Of course I will post pictures of the decorating process and the result. So, dear readers, please cross your fingers, press your thumbs or do whatever you do to wish me luck with this flat!

Pivoting and Alignment

The last few days I have been ill and had to stay at home. I began to feel very down, all my hopes and expectations were gone. I began to worry about everything and just felt bad. This was made worse by feeling guilty for staying home and worrying what my boss was thinking.

There is a little flat I applied for that is perfect for me. I want it so much. As long as I was eager for it, planning, decorating in my mind, it was good. I was mostly convinced I was going to get it. But when I was down all sorts of doubts came, all the bad things I had ever heard about how hard it is to find a good flat etc. etc. came to mind.

I know by now how important my emotions are. If I feel bad, I try to make myself feel good again as fast as possible. So I tried to focus on the positive aspects of everything. (Okay, I'm sick, but hey I can sleep in and stay at home sitting around. Okay, I can't eat, but hey I'll lose weight.) And so on. But I had a hard time turning it around, or pivoting.

So, I went looking for something to help me feel better. There is an audio file called the Rampage of Appreciation on the Abraham website. I listened to that and it instantly made me feel good.

I also listen to Abraham on Youtube sometimes. Since I started it, everything in life got so much better; I am happier, have more fun and more money. And I am better in ballet, too. My foot (I had plantar fasciitis) got better, my strength came back, I dance with more joy and expression. And all that just because I changed my way of thinking. The concept is easy: Think, say and do what makes you feel good. Then you are in alignment. In alignment with who you really are.
It's exactly like in ballet: if you are in alignment, everything is easier and you will get better results.

There are still many habits in my life, habits of thought: concentrating on the problems, fear and self-consciousness. But now I at least see them, and when I catch myself feeling bad I try to pivot. And: I am getting better at it!

If you are down, if reality keeps slapping you in the face, if you feel like your life doesn't go in the right direction, why not try this pivoting process. Just think to yourself: Okay, now I know what I don't want. But what do I want? And then focus on that. Try it.

The First Post

Hello and welcome to my blog!

ME
I am a young woman, still single, recently graduated from university. Sometimes I love me. Sometimes I don't. Soon, I will be moving into my own little flat. And sort of start a new life, maybe? Can't wait. If you want to know more, have a look at my profile.

BALLET
My big passion is ballet, and after almost ten years as a fan from afar, I finally had the guts to start taking classes. That was three years ago, and I couldn't stop since. Who knows how far one can go?

A NEW WAY OF THINKING
Ever heard of the Law of Attraction? (The Secret? Anyone?) The teachings of Abraham?
My family, one friend and I are the only ones I know (personally) who know it and are practicing the art of deliberate creation. We're still beginners. Apparently it is spreading...
It has changed the way I see the world, life, everything.
Most others say it's humbug.

Petrified

I have spent a frustrating week. I wasted so much time because I was afraid to study. I had some nice moments too, like the afternoon in Es and the afternoon in Bi and the day full of tea and thunderstorms.

Yesterday, I had an amazing class. It wasn't that I was particularly good, I just felt challenged and inspired in equal measures. I had the intention to just go for it and I did it. It was so nice and I really had the feeling that I was dancing.

But then I got home and ate much too much and felt sick and lethargic. I became extremely tired and went to bed and slept for some hours. Then tonight I slept for about 9 hours again. I don't know whether it has anything to do with my asking my guides, hs and angels to reach me and teach me and work on me to make me more open, conscious and to reach my goals.

Oh, how I wish it was easter sunday again! And how I wish I could enjoy AND use my free time more! I just seem to sit for hours at my computer, living vicariously through forums and blogs, learning things about life by only reading about them instead of living them. I am so afraid of bad feelings, doubt, failure etc, that I am petrified! I feel cut off from the world, trying to hide my fears. I feel deaf and blind, like I'm stumbling around in the dark. Nothing is secure, I feel uprooted. Questions like "Where am I going to work, where am I going to live, how much am I going to earn, who is going to be with me?" are all still unanswered. There is a bend in the road of my life and it is approaching fast and I have no idea what is going to be around the corner. It is unsettling! I hate that state.
Now I'm crying. I felt those tears inside me for some time. Maybe the feelings will pass once I aknowledge them. But it hurts, I am afraid..

I cried for a few minutes. I felt fear, stress, anger, insecurity. I also think I felt a presence behind me, very subtly, I just knew somebody was there to comfort me. Maybe I just imagined it because I have been reading about angels. But I firmly believe in them and it is so comforting! I feel calmer now. Mam is having coffee and I'm going to join her, have tea and chocolate and be with my family for a while. It will do me good.

Then I will prepare for my job interview and then I will study! It will be good and all my heavenly helpers will help me!